“Don’t make me use it! Now you’ve done it! You… forced me to use it!!!” -Ren Hoek

Today I used a crack to start a computer game I like to play. Now, don’t get me wrong. I own the game, a few months ago I went down to the shop and bought it fair and square. I haven’t lost the DVD, or even just thrown out the guide with the DVD access key by mistake. No sir. The reason I’m using a crack is because I have to. And I’m here to tell you that neither I nor anyone else should have to do that.

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“This is not the target market” -Mitch Hedberg

This morning I noticed a message entitled “Happy birthday Windows Vista” in my inbox. The message was in French but the subject line was still in English, which kinda hints at the idea that Microsoft “doesn’t get” Canada’s bilingualism, but that’s nit-picky of me… the message offers me a 2-for-1 on Vista Ultimate upgrades. If I buy one, I get a second one free.

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The tyranny of low expectations.

The City of Montreal swears it will have the streets cleared of snow. By Christmas. Seriously, that’s the official story. Christmas is the 25th, and thus 9 days since last Sunday’s snowstorm, which only dumped 30cm of snow in the city. How pathetic is that? 9 days to clear 30cm (40 if you count the dusting we got yesterday)… What will happen if we get a 60cm storm? Will the city close down? I used to laugh at New Yorkers who couldn’t deal with a bit of snow, and it turns out that Montreal isn’t really doing any better.

Thoughts on winter driving in Montreal.

When I was a kid, when it snowed local authorities would actually deploy equipment to take the snow off the streets. However that seems like an enchanted and mystical time never to be seen again. We had a snowstorm in Montreal on Sunday, and three days later the streets are still lined with snowbanks — some several feet high — and even the highways are covered in the stuff, stretching 20-minute commutes into two and three hours. What exactly are we paying taxes to the useless assclowns at the city and provincial levels for, anyway?

Deutsche Bank: Merry Christmas renters! You’re now homeless!

Nothing says “Happy Holidays” more than being evicted from your apartment because your landlord got caught up in the subprime lending mess… at least that’s what Deutsche Bank clearly thinks, as they decide it’s absolutely necessary for a partially-blind pensioner to get the f… out of a building they’re trying to sell. Bonus: they “don’t see an upside” in explaining why that is so necessary, so they can’t be bothered.

Thoughts on computers…

I don’t often return stuff to the store where it was bought, especially technology goods. I always have this little drive within me to just work harder at making the devices I buy work, and usually that works. However this year alone I’ve managed to have to return two HP computers back to the shop. One of them was bought in April (I blogged about that), and one of them was the laptop I bought just 3 weeks ago, and which I decided wasn’t going to do.

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And the Janus prize for two-facedness goes to…

Pretty much everyone likes to speed a little sometimes. With a nice car and a nice bit of road, a decent driver will feel the beckoning and put his foot down a little. Of course sometimes some berk overdoes it and ruins it for everybody. He’s speed-camera happy Chief Constable of South Yorkshire Police Meredydd Hughes, he’s prone to rant at speeders, and he got caught going 90mph in a 60mph zone. And now he’s lost his license.

The Great DVD Swindle?

With two competing rather-similar-but-incompatible standards both coming from industry heavyweights it’s easy to think that the high-definition DVD industry is being set up to fail no matter which camp wins. And now film director Michael Bay is squarely alleging that HD-DVD is actually somewhat of a scam orchestrated by Microsoft to ensure the failure of both high definition DVD formats and eventually ensure success for its own upcoming downloadable solutions. Hmm… Sony vs. Microsoft… there’s really no one to root FOR here.