Year: 2006

Texans arrested… for being drunk… in a bar. Dumbass quote of the year: ‘”Going to a bar is not an opportunity to go get drunk,” TABC Capt. David Alexander said. “It’s to have a good time but not to get drunk.”‘ Has the Taliban merely moved from Afghanistan to Texas?..

Afghan man to be executed for adopting Christianity (with bonus ironic photo). Good thing the Taliban is no longer in power there. *They* would have executed him twice!

See a huge collection of the most ridiculously riced-up cars in Britain. Except of course that over there they don’t say “riced up”, they say “chavved up”, after the people who dress up, speak and think like Ali G… only for real, not for a comedy show.

Copyright cartel: copyright more important than human life. Evidently the BSA, MPAA and RIAA have combined into a sort of federation of evil. All the more reason to buy nothing from music labels, movie studios or software companies that are part of the BSA, such as Microsoft and Adobe. Clearly they think nothing of risking lives to establish control over people’s lives, so people need to show that they think nothing of them either. Free software forever!

I must live in the twilight zone! I seem to have no end of problems getting things delivered to my residential address in downtown Montreal. At first I thought it was just UPS drivers doing a poor job, but I just learned that an Amazon package shipped via Canada Post has been returned as “undeliverable” as well, despite my address being correct AND my having confirmed this information on the phone with Canada Post last week.

How hard is it to deliver a package? Evidently a lot harder than I previously thought!

Another risk of clinical drug trials: you could catch TB from your fellow participants. This is pretty creepy too. Makes you wonder how they evaluate one’s fitness to participate in said trials, doesn’t it.

New LED bras lift, separate your message to the world. She may say “my eyes are up here” but the shiny red lights say “hey, don’t stop paying attention to me!”

What can happen during those clinical drug tests people can sign up for? You could be critically ill and at death’s door with a grotesquely-swollen body within hours. It’s definitely food for thought.

Capsaicin may play a role in fighting prostate cancer. Capsaicin, for those who don’t know, is the ingredient in hot peppers that make them hot. So apparently the best way to ward off prostate cancer is to eat everything with hot sauce and choke the chicken regularly. Looks like my generation will be making prostate cancer a thing of the past…

Arizona man arrested for attempted sheep-shagging. Some people say he was stressed out from his job as a fire official, but I say he’s just a baaaaad man desperate to get closer to ewe. Don’t let anyone pull the wool over your eyes, I say.