New LED bras lift, separate your message to the world. She may say “my eyes are up here” but the shiny red lights say “hey, don’t stop paying attention to me!”
What can happen during those clinical drug tests people can sign up for?
What can happen during those clinical drug tests people can sign up for? You could be critically ill and at death’s door with a grotesquely-swollen body within hours. It’s definitely food for thought.
In related news, the makers of Dave’s Insanity announced that they’re now a pharmaceutical firm.
Capsaicin may play a role in fighting prostate cancer. Capsaicin, for those who don’t know, is the ingredient in hot peppers that make them hot. So apparently the best way to ward off prostate cancer is to eat everything with hot sauce and choke the chicken regularly. Looks like my generation will be making prostate cancer a thing of the past…
He’s been a very baaaaaaaad boy.
Arizona man arrested for attempted sheep-shagging. Some people say he was stressed out from his job as a fire official, but I say he’s just a baaaaad man desperate to get closer to ewe. Don’t let anyone pull the wool over your eyes, I say.
That sound you hear is Joseph Heller spinning in his grave.
Gonzales: we don’t torture. Which is to say that we’ve defined ‘torture’ as whatever it is we don’t do. I think he’s lying to the world just like the rest of the gang of thugs in the Bush administration, but I think the only way to prove this would be to waterboard him and deprive him of sleep for a couple of weeks.
Comme un Robin des Bois moderne, sauf qu’ils prennent des gens et donnent aux corporations.
Pensez-vous que vous payez de plus en plus de taxes alors que les entreprises en paient de moins en moins? Eh bien vous avez entièrement raison.
Living within one’s means is apparently un-American.
In the US, if you pay down ‘too much’ of your credit card balance you’ll raise the attention of the Department of Homeland Security. I guess patriotic Americans are expected to pile up more debts instead?
Cue invasion forces… er, never mind.
America finds a biological weapon, also known as a weapon of mass destruction (WMD). The twist? they found it in America. In Texas, to be precise.
There really is no accounting for tastes.
Beijing has a restaurant with a unique specialty: penis. I guess that would be the other other other white meat.
Paging Ted Baxter… Ted Baxter, please pick up the white courtesy phone.
Fox News resident whiny bitch and douchebag emeritus Bill O’Reilly circulating a petition to get MSNBC rival Keith Olbermann taken off the air. He must be counting on the troglodytes who can actually stand to hear his drivel to drive up the petition numbers… or at least he thinks enough of them can read and write to a sufficient level to help in that silly effort.